The Ague

I find myself sitting at work and humming Depeche Mode. The older tunes. My palms are clammy and my brow is hot. I can feel the virus-ey buggers infiltrating my mucus membranes and slowing down my immune system. My epidermis crawls and small sounds make my entire being pulsate.

White blood cells, Red Alert! Department of Homebody Security reports Current Threat Level at Orange, quickly rising to Red! Alert!

Usually I fight off the cold with sheer cussedness and garlic capsules, but today the only effect I feel of the garlic is the occasional stinky burp. I hate being sick. Perhaps I can summon the elemental who can will it away.

Here's what I think:

1. Jhonen Vasquez is a brilliant graphic artist! His publisher. Also published "my" comic, Serenity Rose. Too bad that one sucked.

2. I need some citrus. Maybe I have scurvy.

3. I love Wikipedia.

4. I am really hot. Not like "woohoo, I am so hot!" I am roasting. Ashley thinks I'm going through menopause. Ha ha.

5. The new pope is scary. And I think he's a fascist. Literally.